I’m putting everything from my December in one convenient place: right here. In this post you’ll find what I’ve been doing, watching, thinking, reading, writing, and beyond, with an important update on my mental health. Mostly this is a way for me to journal and reflect on my month. So, take a look at my December journal. Enjoy!
My teeth have been giving me a lot of trouble. My severe anxiety causes me to grind my teeth, which causes migraines and a lot of dental damage. In addition to that, my teeth have been shifting, which causes headaches and a lot of discomfort as well. So, I got an Invisalign. It’s a big lifestyle change, but so far it is helping me. I’m cutting back on teeth grinding, and I already see a huge change in my teeth.
Puppies for Adoption
In October I rescued a pregnant and homeless beagle that I found while walking my two dogs around our farm. In November she delivered eight healthy and absolutely adorable puppies. The puppies are now 6-weeks old, and almost ready to find homes. Hopefully I will be able to find suitable and happy homes for them and their mother when the time comes. View the two-week puppy update here, and the one-month puppy update here. If you are interested in adopting a puppy, please let me know.
After years of dreaming, we finally started construction on my home library. The hardwood floors have been installed, books are slowly being moved, and furniture is finally being ordered and moved in. The library should be fully operational in early 2019. It will be a geek’s wonderland. I’m ready to get back to reading, and I think this library will be a safe haven for me.
Gaming and Self-Care
Sometimes, mental illness can make me feel like I don’t deserve to enjoy things. Especially things that are for solo enjoyment; like one-player video games. I’m all for doing something fun if other people are involved. I will go above and beyond to make sure someone else has fun. But I don’t do the same for myself. I feel like I don’t deserve fun. So, I’m working to break that mindset, one step at a time… and gaming is a nice step. I’ve been playing Let’s Go, Pikachu — it’s something nice that I’m doing for myself. It’s self-care. It’s me allowing myself to enjoy something. I deserve to enjoy things, and I’m using Pikachu to help me believe that.
Christmas and Seasonal Depression
Depression usually creeps in this time of year, and I spend the holiday season struggling with my mental health. I find myself faking a lot of smiles, and forcing myself to attend social events that I don’t necessarily have the energy for. However, this Christmas was different in a very delightful way. My depression was still there, but my smiles were genuine. I’m not saying it was easy; attending Christmas functions while depressed was somewhat of a struggle — but I didn’t overdo it this Christmas. When I needed a break, I took it. When I didn’t feel like talking, I didn’t. I didn’t put on a fake face. I was just myself, and that was enough for my loved ones. On Christmas day, my husband and I visited his aunt’s house (where this picture was taken), followed by my grandmother’s house.
Top 4 Films:
I love December film releases. December is normally a film rich month, and I love going to the cinema. Here are my top 4 films from December. Spoilers ahead. Films listed in the order that I saw them.
Once Upon A Deadpool
Deadpool 2 might be my favorite film of 2018, so of course I loved the Christmas-themed remix. It was fun, hilarious, and Deadpool filled. Plus, the post-credits Stan Lee tribute broke my heart and put it back together. This might be my new favorite Christmas film.
Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse
Miles Morales is my second favorite Spider-Man (with Peter Parker being my favorite, of course), so I was extremely excited to see Miles take center stage. Miles is relatable, vulnerable, willful, and totally awesome. This film went beyond my expectations. I loved watching Miles’ amazing backstory, and seeing his transformation into a Spider-Man. There are SO MANY SPIDER-PEOPLE in this film, and the film did a wonderful job of setting up the various Spider-People (and pigs). Spider-Verse also gave me the comedic aspect that I so dearly love in Spider-Man comic books. Speaking of comic books: the framing and art in this film made me feel like I was inside of a comic book, and I found it marvelous and exciting. Plus, the Stan Lee cameo was absolutely marvelous.
Mary Poppins Returns
I’m a fan of musical theatre, so I approached this film with much excitement and anticipation. My expectations were extremely high, and they were all met. This film is absolutely magical. Lin-Manuel Miranda truly is Non-Stop. Emily Blunt is breathtaking. Films like this are so important to musical theatre, and I’m so glad to be a part of this fan following.
Aquaman was phenomenal. It was beautiful, action packed, appropriately funny, and captivating. I went into this film wanting two really odd things; dry land action, and emphasis on pollution. I got both. Everyone always criticizes Aquaman by saying “he can’t do anything without water”, but the dry land fight scenes in this film myth-busted that criticism. Mera’s red wine scene during the dry land fight is one of my favorites from the film; it showed resourcefulness, power, and it is totally cool. Additionally, the emphasis on plastic pollution made me very happy — it’s a topic that is very important to me, and I’m glad to see it getting attention. However, it was emotionally difficult to see all that plastic in the ocean, harming marine life — even if it was CGI. Also, as a horror fan, I enjoy James Wan (director), and I thought he did a wonderful job with this film.
My Book of the Month:
Turtles All The Way Down, by John Green
In many ways, I feel like John Green reached inside my mind, and wrote what I feel like inside this book. I’ve read this book before, but I read it with a lot of urgency… I pulled it back off the shelf so it could be the first book I read in my new home library. I’m reading it slowly this time, and marking quotes and things that matter to me. It has been a wonderful experience. The main character has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, like me… So I’m taking my time, and comparing the similarities between my thoughts and her thoughts.
Super Awesome Geeky Stuff:
Darren Criss – Entertainer of the Year
Darren Criss is one of my absolute favorite actors. Plus, I love his original music, and his band; Computer Games. I was thrilled when he was name as an Entertainer of the Year this earlier this month!
Blogs in December:
A sampling of the blogs I posted in December.
My Favorite Turkey Burger: A step-by-step recipe for my favorite turkey burger. It is easy to make, absolutely delicious, and under 500 calories.
Barks and Recreation: Puppy Update: A one-month update on the rescue puppies. Visit this post to find updated photos and information for each puppy.
A Christmas Tag: Holiday Questions: Depression usually creeps in this time of year, and I spend the holiday season struggling with my mental health. Because of this, I didn’t intend on writing a Christmas post. But one of my favorite bloggers; Fiona, challenged me to answer some Christmas questions, so I’m gladly rose to the challenge in this post.
Words Matter: Reassuring and Helpful Statements: The holidays can be tough on mental health. So in this post I offer some mental health advice to friends and loved ones. In this post you will find two lists; (1) A list of reassuring things that I want to hear from my friends and loved ones, and (2) A list of seemingly harmless comments that hurt me, and my mental health.
When Mental Illness Makes Small Tasks Overwhelming: Sometimes mental illness can make small and simple daily tasks seem overwhelming. I elaborate on how that makes me feel in this blog post.
One of the highlights of my month was being a part of Ruth in Revolt‘s blog post; 15 Favourite Blog Posts From 15 Favourite Bloggers. Ruth is one of my absolute favorite bloggers, so it was an honor to be mentioned on her blog.
My Mental Health in December – An Honest Update:
My mental health update is at the end of this post for an important reason: I want you to see all the awesome things I did, movie I saw, and blogs I posted, before you read about my mental health. As you can see, this month was fun. So, you might be shocked to learn the status of my mental health: Seasonally Depressed.
I will say, though, I am lucky. I have an amazing support system. I have a best friend, Amber, who always checks on me and makes me feel safe. This month she was a true champion of my mental health. She even got me out of the house a couple of times: she went to a few movies with me, and took me out to eat after. It was nice to socialize and not feel judged. With her, I don’t have to put on a fake smile… I can just be me. She knows my weakness and my strengths, and she supports me…
Also, I have a husband who loves me and constantly works to make me feel loved. This month, I wasn’t capable of grocery shopping or cooking much… So he took me out to eat a lot. I appreciate how understanding and loving he is. Basically: I had a lot of comfort sushi this month…
I’ll admit, finding this support system wasn’t easy and it didn’t happen overnight. It took a lot of work, many years, a lot of trial-and-error, and a lot of accidentally pushing people away. But I’m endlessly thankful to have them now…
I’m ending this month with fun stories to tell, and many blogs that I posted, but overall I feel bad about myself and my emotional-state. Remember, someone may look happy in photos, but that doesn’t negate the fact that they may be depressed and fighting a serious battle inside. Mental illness is invisible.
I’ll see you in January.
Sincerely, Uncustomary Housewife