Matt Haig, author of Reasons to Stay Alive, tweeted something earlier today that really resonated with me; “It is sometimes hard, but hearing from people every day about living with mental health problems is also incredibly inspirational. People surviving through these invisible wars, and living and loving and laughing despite it all, are my heroes.”
This is true in so many ways. So, I want to break this tweet down, and talk about it. I’ll start by addressing the first four words; “It is sometimes hard”.
Since I started blogging about mental health I’ve received tons of messages from people who want to talk about their own struggles. Most days I find myself reading and replying to messages with tears in my eyes. It is sometimes hard. Reading personal messages about self-harm, worthlessness, depression, anxiety, abuse, eating disorders, and suicide isn’t easy. Sometimes it takes an emotional toll on me, and for two main reasons; (1) this stuff is real, and it is valid, and (2) I feel powerless to help these people… all I can offer are my words, and I worry that they won’t be enough.
Now, I want to move on to the second part of his tweet; “but hearing from people every day about living with mental health problems is also incredibly inspirational.”
I’m astonished and inspired by the strength of the people who message me. Some are complete strangers who let their insecurities, fears, failures, and successes spill into heartfelt messages. Some are long-time friends and acquaintances who are telling me about a side of their lives that the outside world has never seen. I sit behind my computer, I read the words of these strong and valid individuals, and I realize two things; (1) I’m not alone, and (2) I want to do everything in my power to show other people that they are not alone.
It is sometimes hard, but it is absolutely always worth it.
On to the third part of his tweet; “People surviving through these invisible wars, and living and loving and laughing despite it all, are my heroes.”
My eyes have been opened to a word of strong individuals who are living courageous lives, while also fighting a war that no one knows about. These people are strong, and beautiful, and kind, and so extremely courageous. Each person is valid, and truly amazing. I am genuinely inspired by the stories I hear, and by the strength of the people that send them to me.
I am so grateful to everyone that has opened up to me. I sincerely hope it never stops. I try my best to help you, but you have helped me more than you know. I love your messages. I love your stories. I love how brave you are. I love all of you. Thank you, forever and always.
Sincerely, Uncustomary Housewife
Read my Mental Health posts by visiting the Mental Health Category on my Uncustomary Housewife blog.
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Thank you for this reading, Elizabeth. Your introduction reminded me of a book that I read many years ago. The title was; “The Road Less Traveled” by Scott Peck. To be honest with you I don’t remember much about this book. However, what caught my attention and what remains with me was the first paragraph; “Life is Hard.” As I remember, the theme was if you accept that life is hard, then it is not so hard.
This was at a time that I experienced a deep clinical depression. There were many things (too extensive to relate in this comment section), that helped me move through this condition. But certainly one of them was this idea, that Mr. Peck presented.
Thank you so much for reading my post, and thank you for commenting. I’m sorry to hear that you’ve also struggled with depression, I know how debilitating and difficult it can be. But, isn’t it odd — how words and books can make us feel stronger, or more understood?
Yes, so true. It was a revelation when I discovered that depression is not a weakness, but a chemical imbalance.
I’m so glad to hear that!
Writing about mental health is difficult as that is what my blog is about. But hear other stories are extremely inspirational.
Thank for posting this.
Thank you for reading. I appreciate it.
Mental health is so varied as well, 8f I have ever tried to help someone with a mental health issue I always feel so useless to them. It’s such a horrible battle for anyone to have to go through. X
Showing that you care, and not judging when someone has the strength to open up is really all you can do sometimes. It can be difficult, and feeling powerless to help is a feeling we share. Just, always be there to listen. Thank you so much for commenting.
I started mental health blogging as a sort of self help method for my own dark days and as an outlet for my ‘weakness.’ Thank you for reminding me that it truly is a strength to acknowledge and share experiences
That’s one of the reasons I started as well. Blogging, and getting it all out there, can be therapeutic. And, at the same time, it can help other people… which is totally awesome. Thank you so much for reading and commenting.
I believe the hardest thing is speaking to others. It is hard, at least for me, to take others into confidence. Lack of courage isn’t the issue. I believe it is more worry. I worry that others my betray my trust or make light of what I say.
I can understand those fears; breaking confidence, and fear that someone will make light of what you’ve said. Both are very valid fears, and fears that most of us probably share. I actually wrote a blog post about people making light of mental illness and how it makes me feel. It’s a tough situation. Finding someone you can confide in, and trust, is a difficult task. I’m sorry that you have to worry about it.
Matt Haig is a great find. I’ve read some of his fiction too and it’s quite thought provoking. I really like the conclusions you came to when breaking down the tweet. We live in a world where it’s easier to be silent than to be honest. We could all use an outlet to organize our thoughts. Negative or not.
Thank you for reading and commenting. I appreciate it. I agree, Haig’s writing is very thought provoking. I enjoy it, very much.
I might not comment often, but reading your stuff really does help me. Know that you are changing lives…
Thank you very much. I sincerely appreciate your comment. It means a lot to me.
“It is sometimes hard, but it is absolutely, always worth it.” Thank you for these beautiful and empowering words, Elizabeth. I recently started my own blog as a way to challenge myself to confront and reflect on my depression and anxiety in a more productive way, and hopefully, to share my story with others – it’s nice to see in the comments how many other people are also willing to share their stories. I’ve experienced how exhausting and draining it can be to try to work through difficult feelings, as well as the frustration of not knowing how to help a friend who is struggling. I’m trying to remember that it’s always worth it. Really appreciate this blog post.
Thank you for reading and commenting. I’m glad to hear that you started a blog. I sincerely appreciate your kind words. Continue remembering, it is always worth it!
Great post. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you for reading, I really appreciate it.
I love Matt Haig, I decided to start my blog while reading Reasons to Stay Alive. Everything he writes is just perfect.
I absolutely love him too! Thank you for reading, and commenting, I really appreciate it.
Well written Elizabeth. Always remember that noine in the world is alone,as long as they keep searching.
Reblogged this on Fox&Co. Mental Health and commented:
I love how @uncustomaryhousewife says everything I have been thinking the past few days about how hard it can be do be an author of a mental health blog. It almost is like reliving the pain. But it is worth it to help others! 100 %